The ability to fall in love and be loved starts in the teenage years. When two love birds meet, a strong feeling of affection strikes between them. Love at this stage is more intense and mind occupying than at later stages. Most teens at this level can’t differentiate whether this is true love or not. Attraction is commonly referred to as infatuation. The two are best evaluated on the following sub topics:
Teens in love are faithful to their partners and to the promises they make to each other. They stand for and by each other at all times. They assist each other socially and financially. Infatuation is the exact opposite. It is temporary and no much feeling for the other partner hence several disappointments and let-downs.
With true love, the bond is as strong as a mother and baby relationship. Over the years, this relationship does not deteriorate but keeps getting better. Whether in riches or poverty their bond remains constant. Infatuation does not stand the test of time and is not constant at all times because it is “faked love.”
Intimacy is crucial for a healthy relationship. It is not advisable for teens to be intimate at this stage but more than three quarter of teenage relationships get intimate, recent research reveals. Intimacy merges and brings them closer. It is good to note that with true love, the partners are faithful to each other, while with infatuation one is severally unfaithful and does not give a damn.
Love develops with time whereas infatuation is instant! Taking time ensures you know well the person you are dating and allows for slow growth of love, which is healthy. Real love lasts long but infatuation is short lived. Infatuation normally breaks up after intimacy, disappointments, or the shortcomings of a relationship.
Love produces security while infatuation produces insecurity. True love trusts and is honest whereas infatuation is jealous and very insecure. One is never sure of their partner and this leads to lack of self-worth and possessiveness. With love, this is not the case.
Infatuation has a disorganizing and destructive effect. It makes one feel less efficient, inaccurate and unable to fulfill their dreams and desires. On the other side, love motivates good behavior and a sense of self-worth.
A person with infatuation always sees the faults in you and uses them to hit back on you whereas love sees and corrects the faults in you so as to make you a better and reliable person.
Dr Prem Jagyasi (c)
Author, Chartered Consultant, Personal Branding Expert & Global Trainer at DrPrem.com
Author of several life improving guide books – Dr Prem is an award winning strategic global leader, successful chartered consultant, personal branding expert and global trainer. Dr Prem has traveled to more than 40 countries to work with above 150 international organisations and to speak in global conferences. Dr Prem has published several guide books and numerous niche websites which have millions of reader across the globe.